This is the post excerpt.
This is the post excerpt.
The last week I started a journey to love myself in every aspect, it means that I started a process to love my body just the way it is, to hug my insecurities and flaws, to listen to my fears and to love me in every aspect.
Self love, is a process that have teach me how the society affect the way you see yourself in the mirror, it had teach me that there are insecurities that were teach to me when I was little.
In this journey, I know that it will be brigther days than others, but I will find my own definition of beauty, of strenght and to be genuine of who I am besides the others critics and expectations.
Is beautiful that I started this journey with the company of other women that are tired as me of feeling bad for not reaching the standards that our context put in ourselves, even when we do not asked for them.
So, here I am giving me the chance of make a deep chancg that will allow me to understand where I learned my sencurities and why I haved carry them through all this years.
This change of mindset is live changing and it will guide me in the path to discover my dreams and to create my own journey.
Y ella me ama a pesar de mis defectos,
Es capaz de ver mis virtudes cuando yo solo me siento bloqueada,
Es capaz de amarme más allá de mis errores,
Es capaz de darme luz en días de oscuridad,
De darme aliento cuando yo siento que es difícil respirar,
Ella me da vida
Porque ella en si lo es.
Sueño con un mundo donde el amor no se tenga que esconder,
Donde se pueda tener el privilegio de ser libre siempre,
Simplemente nosotras siendo y dejándonos ser siempre
Permitiendo que el amor fluya en cada poro de nuestro cuerpo,
Ni pausas forzadas,
Donde la libertad nos llene tanto que ella y nuestro amor sea lo único que tengamos seguro en nuestro mundo,
Sueño con tenerte siempre,
Con que tu amor sea la única cura que necesite en mis días malos,
Y así retemos al mundo entero por amarnos,
Será la mejor gloria de mi vida si salgo de esa batalla cogida de tu mano.
I dream about the day that we not need to hide, the day that I will be genuine in every sphere of my life, the day that I will be with you no matter who or not matter why, the day in which our love will win over the anger that surround us, when our love will be bigger than all our fears.
I fall in love with you, even though it could be difficult. I fall in love with your soul and your flaws, cause I think they fit perfect with mine. I love to think that our chaos only calm down when we are together.
I know that every day that passed we are near from that, I hope and expect that love wins and overcome everything. The day when the people that we love support our love without any “but”, when we could be finally ourselves with everyone without telling any lies because of the fear of being judge.
Since then, I’m just writting about you, I’m writting about how proud I’m of us, because even when we feel weak we are still together.
So, I’m here fighting for you.
Somedays are easier than others, somedays I expect more from myself and the people around me, somedays I feel weak in the morning and powerfull at night.
Somedays I prefer being a dreamer than being consume by the reality, somedays I rather be hiding my demons and some others I decide to fight against them.
Somedays is the power of love overcame fear but somedays my fear is bigger than me.
But here I am trying to redefine how my somedays work, trying to change the flaws in myself, changing my demons and trying to be a better me day by day, because life is transformation and progress.
See happiness as a road not as a destination and remember even in the hard somedays is always something good.
I forgive myself for everytime that I trust the wrong people or put them over me, for not running from all the toxic relationships that stop my soul, I forgive myself for every mistake that I have made and I promise not to punish myself anymore. I forgive myself for not going out of my comfort zone and to be scared of all the experiences and opportunities that passed away.
I forgive myself for comparing me with other when my real competence is between my yesterday self. I forgive myself for being sad without any suportted reason.
I promise me a new beginning, a new way to make the things right or at least try those things that fear not allow me to do. I promise me to look for new chances that make me stronger and happier in every single way and finally I promise myself not let myself down anymore.
Sometimes there are days which you aprreciated more the little things. That you focus yourself in how the drops of the rain fall and fall, how the clouds are moved by the wind, etc.
And then little flashbacks start to get into your mind, that memories when you feel happier, when everything was in it’s place, but ironically now you fall in love with the chaos. The chaos of feeling a lot of emotions though the day, to fall in love for a person that is difficult to fall for, to be hidden in so many ways that you can even start talking about.
All your inner you has been in the dark since the beginning, but at the shadows your past will never leave you. Otherwise, past remind you the things that you accomplished, all the obstacles that you passed, all the times you survive when you though you can’t, all the fears that you overcome and reminds you that the best is yet to come.
Somedays is eassier to love you without any difficulty, somedays I feel more free to love you without feeling shame of my feelings towards you.
There are other days in which days are more realistic than others, where our love meets the difficulties of being restricted in so many ways.
I don’t know if everybody feels this at least once, but I start thinking that I am not the only one that felt in love with someone that was totally unexpected.
This unexpected kind of love is the one that is full of magic, of true love, of comprehenssion etc. That makes me feel sure of the desicions that I have made to keep our love no matter what.
Somedays is more difficult to hide the feelings that I have, when our eyes meet and I feel magic in every molecule of my body, when you smile and I thought that I am the reason of that or when we finally can meet together alone just being ourselves, without any masks, forgetting about all and it is only one thing left that is you and me.
I’ts difficult to be a women where you learned to compare yourself with others where the world tell you how to act, dress, think etc. Where is difficult to determine wich of your thoughts are for your own or where learned in a society where we have to be the expectation of others.
Where is difficult to be completely yourself, where the critics are more abundant than the good comentaries. Where is difficult to be genuine with yourself, with your mission in life. Where is easy to lose yourself because of pretending be someone that is not you.
Where is easy to hide insecurities, overweight, flaws etc. Because is more difficult to seem weak, so you force youself to look always strong. But, is that ok?… Is it okay to hide yourself? or be the kind of women that the society expect?
Where the beauty standard are so hard that is difficult to ignore them, where women learned to be in shadows where they only become with brightness, where other women and you are not in a competition they are your complement, where you have create you own beauty standars and understand that the beauty of your heart and soul is more important that your weight.
Where we have to stand for ourselves, where all can change the world changing the way we see it. Where your weakness and flaws empowered yourself in many ways that you can not even imagine, where you can be completely yourself without feeling shame because you are exactly the kind of women that empowers others to be their own deffinition of beautiful.
Somedays the magic is more evident that others, you feel that finally all is working out, but also is a little part of realism in the fairytale. Not everything will be perfect, but you learn to appreciate the little things that make life worth it.
This little parts are irrepleceable make a diference about living with a purpose or just going trough day by day without making any change in yourself, in others and in the world. So why are you living? When you start to thinking in this deep question you are start asking yourself if you have a mission and if yes which is it.
When you finally start to have the answer all you do is with a purpose, the live in itself start taking a new direction, all starts to fit exactly and you start to notice that your existence in this world is worth it.